Thanks to never throwing away a single email of the tens of thousands I’ve exchanged between myself and certain friends, I dug up an old one that I thought I had written but wasn’t sure I actually had written.
Because it referenced Taylor Swift.
So, you know, considering the fact I was 45 years old at the time, that’s totally something I would not trust my memory about.
The email, sent on Thurs., 30 April 2015 at 10:04 am, is to my friend Penelyn. The subject line reads: “Oh, P.” And it just starts in the middle of something—no preamble or preface. Just this thread:
Me: It was horrible! I had a dream featuring Taylor Swift. Have a great day!
P: Oh dear…. What IS happening??
Me: I don’t know. But it was really a sweet, innocent interlude – it was like she was my niece or something and had just come to spend the summer. I guess I need to get back on the Swiftamine.
[So that P. would know what I was talking about, I attached a Taylor Swift-themed SNL skit to the email. Judging by her next response, she must have watched it.]
P: LMAO !!!
Me: I totally identified with that skit when they aired it. I want Taylor to do well in all things. She’s a sweet, savvy girl.
When we had this exchange, the fact that I dreamed about Taylor Swift was merely funny. Looking back, it’s weird and funny.
But there was a good explanation: a few messages later in the email thread, I informed my friend P. that I had “emailed my forgiveness” to an ex-girlfriend who had done me dirty a couple years before that.
Then I went on to talk about how “at peace” I was with “everything,” not just with being done dirty by my ex-girlfriend. (Full disclosure: I vacillate in my peacefulness about this whole dark episode of my life, even now. But on that day, I was at peace.)
Had opening up to the universe somehow opened me up to the idea of Taylor Swift’s being my rich and famous niece, too? Or was it vice-versa?
No clue. The email wound down after that and I forgot about it until now.
And anyway, who gives a shit?